Indescribable

Sometimes trying too hard in what ever things u do will make u insane lost and suddenly when u wan to do it ur mind suddenly goes blank haizz.. i know myself i been trying hard in my studies now which make me feels so different now at times when someone like example mum ask me eat dinner i will talk loudly towards her it is because i feeel soo... which i duno how to describe my mind is keep running why this why that how to solve who can help me etc i been trying to work my way out to handle my studies wo hao leh le :( stop gaming i have did it le while else on the weekends been drinking almost every week which i think can destress me looks like i am wrong le :( is jus like yea u are happy for a momment like 3-4hours in the pub drinking etc and suddenly the next day u wake up is back to normal life and whats more hangover due to over drink of alochol. haizz what should i do noww.. at times now i stone for secs asking myself am i ok am i over clocking my body and mind am i able to cope all this if i fall now who will be there for me.. been telling myself i cant fall i need to stay strong  till everything ends. sometimes at night 1+ i go down alone to grab a Teh to drink and chill why all my close buddies stay so far from me :( sometimes jr my parents ask me am i ok ma for my studies i reply yes actually but the truth is i duno whats the ans.. and i feel very lost sometimes but till i am gona tell myself i can do it!  Gona end here le i feel my head is very heavy now after writing all this gona rest on bed and grab a coffee in the morning to keep myself awake later..





 

Poly Life!

Ever since i started poly omfg really need neglect my games my lol friends buddy all and focus on my fcuking poly work the A maths is really no kidding freaking hard to do everyweek i have homework to do mon-fri freaking 9-6 or 8-5 at sch timetable shag max reach home 7+8 bathe finish all dinner 9+ do my work 10+ 11 and need sleep nxt day same thing...In Poly time is precious late 1 min teacher scold u give u warning nb bloody hell really hate the morning wed 8am lesson teacher freaking @sshole his gona send me my first letter without fail if i late tml.. damn fierce strict guy and do maths he love to skip steps and write answer  straight bloody hate him la... but tat doesnt mean i gona hate maths i am a maths lover is jus tat tis freaking A maths all is total new thing to me need ppl who can help me and guide me with my maths.. those who put in effort willing to teach me i will really put in my heart to learn it and remeber it in my brain but bear with me i need to keep repeat tis why why and u need to explain to me 3-4 times to me den i will really oh ok understand le. A slow learner :( but i am willing to try hard for this fcuking maths!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Got karmen jie jie to help me along on phone with her to do maths for jus 3qns we took 2hour+ damn siao rite LOL very glad and happy she willing to help me xoxo and patiencely explain to me again and again why tis why is like tat how to do it how to sub in this and that.. lucky she didnt scold me phew and keep repeating help me hope she dont go mad at me x.x Nah karmen jie jie if u gt read my blog typing tis to uuu! thxxxxxx alottt appreaciate alottt too!!

All i wan to say is very stress shag in poly not like ite so relax and i can score! everything is differenttt! gona work hard for it! thx those who keep encouraging me i can do it have faith on me like ex. jr darling, victor!, karmen jie jie, xoxo u all!

Life been pretty ok jus everyday not enough sleep thats all and feel freaking tired the momment i hit home! need get use to this kind of lifestyle no choice. Jr also everyday work come back also freaking tired now i can feeel himmm plus he drive too even tired!! the feeling iss sooooo arrw whole person shaggg!! max.