Sometimes trying too hard in what ever things u do will make u insane lost and suddenly when u wan to do it ur mind suddenly goes blank haizz.. i know myself i been trying hard in my studies now which make me feels so different now at times when someone like example mum ask me eat dinner i will talk loudly towards her it is because i feeel soo... which i duno how to describe my mind is keep running why this why that how to solve who can help me etc i been trying to work my way out to handle my studies wo hao leh le :( stop gaming i have did it le while else on the weekends been drinking almost every week which i think can destress me looks like i am wrong le :( is jus like yea u are happy for a momment like 3-4hours in the pub drinking etc and suddenly the next day u wake up is back to normal life and whats more hangover due to over drink of alochol. haizz what should i do noww.. at times now i stone for secs asking myself am i ok am i over clocking my body and mind am i able to cope all this if i fall now who will be there for me.. been telling myself i cant fall i need to stay strong till everything ends. sometimes at night 1+ i go down alone to grab a Teh to drink and chill why all my close buddies stay so far from me :( sometimes jr my parents ask me am i ok ma for my studies i reply yes actually but the truth is i duno whats the ans.. and i feel very lost sometimes but till i am gona tell myself i can do it! Gona end here le i feel my head is very heavy now after writing all this gona rest on bed and grab a coffee in the morning to keep myself awake later..
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